Zach, 16, was diagnosed with ADHD and Executive Functioning problems. This meant that school was never fun and he resisted homework and lied sometimes about anything related to school. He was also depressed because school is a huge part of his life and it wasn’t what made him tick.
His mom, concerned and motivated to help him, came to me for coping strategies. While I appreciate the role of coping and strategies in the lives of teens, focusing on this aspect of functioning is not the most effective way to help teens do well in life. Supporting our child to find their hidden design is far more powerful. Their hidden design is their power skill, the unique aspect of their personality or skill set that may not fit into some objectively defined success story. But this hidden design is what motivates them, what drives their choices, constitutes how they find flow and will likely be their contribution to the world.